chuckhistory:

And the Jr. Darwin Award goes tooooo…

chuckhistory:

And the Jr. Darwin Award goes tooooo…

(via glugla)

Shouldn’t it be Bun in the Oven? - Gun, drugs catch fire after Kentucky mom stores them in oven and son cooks

LOUISVILLE, Ky — A Louisville mother has been arrested after police said she hid a gun and a large amount of marijuana in an oven.
This happened Tuesday afternoon in a home in the 4600 block of Plane Tree Drive in Okolona.
According to the police report, Shantina McDonald’s son was cooking food when the oven caught fire. The son told police that while the fire was burning, he heard several loud popping sounds.
After firefighters put the flames out, they said they discovered a handgun that had been destroyed in the fire and the remnants of what appeared to be at least one pound of marijuana.
Police said they saw several rounds that had been fired in the oven.
McDonald is charged with wanton endangerment and trafficking marijuana.

Shouldn’t it be Bun in the Oven? - Gun, drugs catch fire after Kentucky mom stores them in oven and son cooks

LOUISVILLE, Ky — A Louisville mother has been arrested after police said she hid a gun and a large amount of marijuana in an oven.

This happened Tuesday afternoon in a home in the 4600 block of Plane Tree Drive in Okolona.

According to the police report, Shantina McDonald’s son was cooking food when the oven caught fire. The son told police that while the fire was burning, he heard several loud popping sounds.

After firefighters put the flames out, they said they discovered a handgun that had been destroyed in the fire and the remnants of what appeared to be at least one pound of marijuana.

Police said they saw several rounds that had been fired in the oven.

McDonald is charged with wanton endangerment and trafficking marijuana.

Henry Gribbohm Loses Life Savings At Carnival Game, Wins Stuffed Banana With Dreadlocks
He emptied his bank account, and all he has is this Rasta banana.

Henry Gribbohm, 30, has filed a police report after he says he lost over $2,600 on a carnival game and won only a stuffed banana with dreadlocks, WLKY reported.
The Epsom, N.H., man attended a carnival in Manchester on Saturday where he played a ball-tossing game called “Tubs of Fun.” Gribbohm told WBZ-TV his goal was to win an Xbox Kinect for his kids, but after spending $300 on the game without success, he went home to get another $2,300 — all of the money he had.
“They explained to me I was going to get all my money back,” Gribbohm told WMUR, “I was going to get an Xbox Kinect … They lied to me.”
“Tubs of Fun” costs $5 for two balls, according to the New Hampshire Union Leader. The player must throw the balls into a tilted bucket.

Henry Gribbohm Loses Life Savings At Carnival Game, Wins Stuffed Banana With Dreadlocks

He emptied his bank account, and all he has is this Rasta banana.

Henry Gribbohm, 30, has filed a police report after he says he lost over $2,600 on a carnival game and won only a stuffed banana with dreadlocks, WLKY reported.

The Epsom, N.H., man attended a carnival in Manchester on Saturday where he played a ball-tossing game called “Tubs of Fun.” Gribbohm told WBZ-TV his goal was to win an Xbox Kinect for his kids, but after spending $300 on the game without success, he went home to get another $2,300 — all of the money he had.

“They explained to me I was going to get all my money back,” Gribbohm told WMUR, “I was going to get an Xbox Kinect … They lied to me.”

“Tubs of Fun” costs $5 for two balls, according to the New Hampshire Union Leader. The player must throw the balls into a tilted bucket.

WTF. A blind man could’ve seen that coming.

5-year old boy kills sister with rifle he got as a gift - “Just one of those crazy accidents!”

Maybe the headline should have been, What parent gives a .22 caliber rifle as a gift to a 5-year old?

BURKESVILLE, KENTUCKY — Authorities say a 5-year-old child in Kentucky shot and killed his 2-year-old sister with a rifle he got as a gift.

Local coroner Gary White tells WKYT-TV that the mother said she had been outside on a porch for “no more than three minutes” on Thursday when the shooting occurred.

White also told the Lexington Herald-Leader the boy’s .22-caliber rifle was a present and he is used to shooting it. He said the rifle was kept in a corner and the family didn’t realize a shell was left inside it.

White said the shooting will be ruled accidental. “Just one of those crazy accidents,” he said.

i-do-even-lift:

brittanakissed:

i’m just going to lie on my floor until i become attractive

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(via everythingistotallybrilliant)

Don’t Copy Everything You See in Porn - Man Watched and then Stuck Live Eel up his Butt…it ate through his Colon.
Do not try this at home. Do not try this anywhere. Just do not try it.
A man in China’s southeastern Guangdong province admitted himself to a local hospital after he reportedly got a live eel stuck inside him. According to British tabloid The Sun, the man inserted the 20-inch-long Asian swamp eel into his anus after seeing it done in a porn movie, and he had to endure all-night surgery to have it extracted.
According to a HuffPost translation of Chinese news aggregation website Mop.com, the eel reportedly chewed through the man’s colon, perforating his large intestine, and became stuck in his body cavity. A graphic X-ray image shows how far inside the eel was when the man came in for treatment.
Medical team members reportedly said the eel, which was “simply trying to find its way out,” was alive when removed but died shortly thereafter. According to The Sun, the man is still recovering at the hospital and might face animal cruelty charges.
The Asian swamp eel — also known as the rice eel or rice paddy eel — is a snake-shaped fish that is commonly sold live at food markets in East Asian countries.
Although this type of eel is known as an invasive species in parts of the United States, this isn’t the first time that it’s made its way into (ahem) foreign habitats.
In 2012, a New Zealand man had to have an eel removed from his posterior. In 2010, a Chinese man died after his friends allegedly inserted an eel into his rectum as a joke.

Don’t Copy Everything You See in Porn - Man Watched and then Stuck Live Eel up his Butt…it ate through his Colon.

Do not try this at home. Do not try this anywhere. Just do not try it.

A man in China’s southeastern Guangdong province admitted himself to a local hospital after he reportedly got a live eel stuck inside him. According to British tabloid The Sun, the man inserted the 20-inch-long Asian swamp eel into his anus after seeing it done in a porn movie, and he had to endure all-night surgery to have it extracted.

According to a HuffPost translation of Chinese news aggregation website Mop.com, the eel reportedly chewed through the man’s colon, perforating his large intestine, and became stuck in his body cavity. A graphic X-ray image shows how far inside the eel was when the man came in for treatment.

Medical team members reportedly said the eel, which was “simply trying to find its way out,” was alive when removed but died shortly thereafter. According to The Sun, the man is still recovering at the hospital and might face animal cruelty charges.

The Asian swamp eel — also known as the rice eel or rice paddy eel — is a snake-shaped fish that is commonly sold live at food markets in East Asian countries.

Although this type of eel is known as an invasive species in parts of the United States, this isn’t the first time that it’s made its way into (ahem) foreign habitats.

In 2012, a New Zealand man had to have an eel removed from his posterior. In 2010, a Chinese man died after his friends allegedly inserted an eel into his rectum as a joke.

Bronx HS Science Teacher Flunks Biology - Gets Preggers by Student
A Bronx science teacher who embarked on a passionate affair with a student discouraged him from using condoms — and ended up pregnant.
Felicia Barahona, a 32-year-old teacher at DeWitt Clinton High School, began the four-month sexual relationship at her home on the boy’s 18th birthday.
The disturbing romance was revealed in a bombshell report by the special commissioner of investigation, Richard Condon, after the Daily News filed a freedom of information request.
Barahona, a veteran of the Afghanistan war, was fired in August — around the time she gave birth to their baby.
The relationship started during fall 2011 and quickly escalated into a sex-fest where the couple had intimate encounters “about five times a week, on weekdays and on weekends,” the report said.
When the student tried to use condoms, Barahona — who earned nearly $73,000 a year — told him “she didn’t like condoms” and “not to worry,” according to the report.

When Barahona found out she was pregnant, her young lover accompanied her to doctors’ appointments, he told investigators.
The educator had fallen so hard, she even bought wedding rings for both of them in the hope that they would marry. But they broke up after an argument in early 2012.

Bronx HS Science Teacher Flunks Biology - Gets Preggers by Student

A Bronx science teacher who embarked on a passionate affair with a student discouraged him from using condoms — and ended up pregnant.

Felicia Barahona, a 32-year-old teacher at DeWitt Clinton High School, began the four-month sexual relationship at her home on the boy’s 18th birthday.

The disturbing romance was revealed in a bombshell report by the special commissioner of investigation, Richard Condon, after the Daily News filed a freedom of information request.

Barahona, a veteran of the Afghanistan war, was fired in August — around the time she gave birth to their baby.

The relationship started during fall 2011 and quickly escalated into a sex-fest where the couple had intimate encounters “about five times a week, on weekdays and on weekends,” the report said.

When the student tried to use condoms, Barahona — who earned nearly $73,000 a year — told him “she didn’t like condoms” and “not to worry,” according to the report.

When Barahona found out she was pregnant, her young lover accompanied her to doctors’ appointments, he told investigators.

The educator had fallen so hard, she even bought wedding rings for both of them in the hope that they would marry. But they broke up after an argument in early 2012.


What not to do: Tennessee High School Teacher solicits Sex with Students…via Facebook
A married Tennessee high school teacher bombarded an underage student with Facebook messages asking him for sex, police said.
Angela Gaye Masingo, 39, was arrested after the boy’s parents intercepted the communications and tipped off police.
The alleged victim was not a pupil at Greenback School, where Masingo has taught since 1995.
Masingo, whose father is a teacher and administrator at the school, was arrested at her home has now been charged with solicitation of aggravated statutory rape.
The Lenoir City resident is also accused of solicitation of sexual exploitation of a minor, and has been suspended from her job.
She is being held at Blount County Detention Center on $80,000 bond, and will appear in court on Friday.

What not to do: Tennessee High School Teacher solicits Sex with Students…via Facebook

A married Tennessee high school teacher bombarded an underage student with Facebook messages asking him for sex, police said.

Angela Gaye Masingo, 39, was arrested after the boy’s parents intercepted the communications and tipped off police.

The alleged victim was not a pupil at Greenback School, where Masingo has taught since 1995.

Masingo, whose father is a teacher and administrator at the school, was arrested at her home has now been charged with solicitation of aggravated statutory rape.

The Lenoir City resident is also accused of solicitation of sexual exploitation of a minor, and has been suspended from her job.

She is being held at Blount County Detention Center on $80,000 bond, and will appear in court on Friday.

Justin Bieber in designer diapers

Justin Bieber in designer diapers

33-year old Mom Arrested for Providing Underage Son & Friends Strippers for Bowling Alley Birthday Party

SOUTH GLENS FALLS — A Gansevoort woman was arrested Monday for allegedly arranging to have two strippers perform at her son’s 16th birthday party in November.

Village Police charged Judy H. Viger, 33, of Dimmick Road in Gansevoort, with five counts of endangering the welfare of a child.

She’s accused of organizing, managing and paying for two adult female entertainers who performed personal and intimate dances for five teens younger than 17.

The incident occurred Nov. 3 at the Spare Time Bowling Center in South Glens Falls.

Police said no other arrests are expected.

Saratoga County District Attorney James Murphy said the investigation was prompted by parents and children who attended the party and were “outraged” by what they witnessed. He said police interviewed a number of witnesses, including the dancers, bowling alley employees and people who attended the party.

Children at the party were as young as 13, Murphy said. He said police decided five charges were sufficient, though more could have been filed based on statements from witnesses.

“The charges stem from an allegation that she endangered not only the welfare of her own child, but the welfare of the 14- and 15-year-old children that were at the birthday party as well,” Murphy said.

Viger’s lawyer, Joseph Brennan, said Monday afternoon he was told the charges were not yet filed in court.

“I’m not going to comment on anything I haven’t seen,” he said.

The incident took place inside a private room with paper covering the glass door. The strippers, wearing bras and panties, were photographed performing dances on party attendees, some of whom were as young as 15.

Police began investigating when photos were posted on social media websites. At first, officers were told the women were a “bikini gram” brought in to sing “Happy Birthday” to the teen. No charges were filed.

But when The Post-Star published a story about the party, police and the newspaper received copies of photos the teen’s friends and relatives had posted on websites after the party. The photos seemed to contradict the “bikini gram” version of events.

Police said they were not shown those photos during their initial investigation.

The charge of endangering the welfare of a child accuses a person of “knowingly acting in a manner likely to be injurious to the physical, mental or moral welfare of a child younger than 17.” It is punishable by up to a year in county jail.

Viger is scheduled to appear March 7 in Moreau Town Court.

Brothers Celebrate Lottery Win by Blowing up House and Getting Arrested

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Two brothers who were celebrating a $75,000 winning lottery ticket by purchasing marijuana and meth accidentally blew up their house on Friday, said Sgt. Bruce Watts of the Wichita Police Department.

The explosion sent one of the brothers – a 27-year-old – to the hospital, where he remains in serious but stable condition with second-degree burns on his hands, arms and chest.

The other brother was sent to jail, Watts said.

The brothers were in a house in the 100 block of North Nevada Court, near Douglas and West Street, about 7 p.m. Friday, Watts said. One of the brothers went to the kitchen to refuel the butane torches they planned to use to light their bongs. He emptied a couple of large cans of butane lighter fluid, leaking butane into the air.

“The butane vapor reached the pilot light in the furnace, and as you might expect, ka-boom,” Watts said.

The victim was wearing a lottery T-shirt during the explosion.

The victim’s girlfriend loaded him and some children into a car and took him to the Via Christi Hospital on St. Francis emergency room, where she dropped him off and left.

Officers went to the house with a warrant, where the other brother ran out, admitting he had marijuana and methamphetamine. He was arrested.

The Tree Did It

They were drunk, high and speeding away from a crime scene — but a new lawsuit says it’s the tree’s fault they crashed.

The family of a woman who died in a fiery wreck is suing homeowners in a Tampa-area neighborhood where she and a fellow suspect hit a tree during a high-speed chase and died.

The suit says the wreck is the homeowners’ fault for failing to put up a warning sign near the tree.

isitis:

wonderlandleighleigh:

ladyymacdeath:

rhiannon42:

theslowestdrawfag:

engine-red:

going-foresightseeing:

seerofsarcasm:

oxybelis:

starfishface:

elfuckinghomosexual:

lilpocketninja:

goddessofcheese:

This makes me want a video game about a zombie apocalypse that only affects men so it’s up to the housewives of 50s’ America to save humanity.

…saving this idea for class.

i would play the heck out of that game, it is an amazing idea.

Also can there be a character design screen so you can make your little housewife?

I think it’d be entertaining to see what guys could come up with for making their female-selves. If you ask me.

I would so play this game. 

I would suck at it but I would play it.

I’ve never played a zombie game, but you got me at 50’s.

Hngggggggg I love 50s clothes give it to me

OMG I already thought of some sort of premise:

In 1953 a certain laboratory on an undisclosed location developed a serum that could genetically modify humans, giving them enhanced speed, agility, strength, and brainpower.

Scientists found a way to modify the serum such that it could only activate itself in the presence of a Y chromosome, thus isolating the effects to men, mostly because of female discrimination at the time.

The serum was a success, and sales skyrocketed just a few weeks after its release.

What the developers did not anticipate, though, was the human body’s incapacity to handle the serum. The mental and physical over-exhaustion triggered a mental decay which starts out slow, but speeds up exponentially within a few months after usage of the serum. The brains of the users are left with only the most basic survival reflexes, transforming the users into strong, fast, agile, emotionless human shells, devouring any mobile life form in their path.

Bites from the affected individuals could place copies of the rogue serum into the bodies of the bitten, giving them the symptoms. Shortly after, the serum evolved into a sort of genetic virus, causing mental decay in just days. No one was safe. No one…

…except the women.

*cue in epic music*

Can you imagine the shitstorm this game would cause. I’d laugh pretty hard.

Would still play it though.

Not gonna lie, I’d play the shit out of this.

I approve of this concept 100%

CAN THIS BE A THING PLEASE?

This sounds amazing, and I need it in my life.

I would this game and play the heck out of it… I don’t have consoles (PC gamer) but I would invest in one just to play it

(via jumblejo)

Internet-Famous Tattoo Artist Inks His Name Across Teen Girlfriend’s Face 24 Hours After Meeting Her

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Rouslan Toumaniantz first rose to Internet fame nearly four years ago, after he allegedly tattooed 56 stars on a Belgian teen’s face against her wishes.

Kimberley Vlaeminck became an overnight meme after she claimed that Toumaniantz gave her 53 more facial stars than she asked for.

Maintaining throughout the affair that Vlaminck asked for 56 stars, Toumaniantz was ultimately vindicated when the girl admitted she did in fact request the tattoo, and only made up the cover story after her dad saw the stars and got mad.

But the sensational headlines in the days leading up to Vlaeminck’s confession permanently scarred Toumaniantz’s business, and he was forced to flee to Russia for a fresh start.

While there, Toumaniantz began an online relationship with an 18-year-old named Lesya, and the two ended up falling in love. They arranged to meet in person, and it was apparently re-love at first sight.

Looking for a way to broadcast their mutual affection to the world, Lesya agreed to allow Toumaniantz to tattoo his name (since changed to “Ruslan”) across her face, just 24 hours after the two met in person for the first time.

“It’s a symbol of our eternal devotion. I’d like him to tattoo every inch of my body,” she wrote on her Facebook page.

The giant face tat wasn’t entirely out of place on Lesya: She had previously inked the words “all for love” on her forehead.

“I know that there are people who are terrified that Lesya has made a rash decision that she’ll regret horribly,” a friend of the tattoo-happy couple is quoted as saying,”but sometimes the best decisions are the ones you make in an instant with your heart rather than the ones long-debated in your mind.”

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